The Housemaid: Good for her

★★★★--Love a good bitty-driven erotic thriller. Kind of hot at times. Hard to watch at others. Still glad I saw it, and it’s still out in theaters, which seems like a good sign. 

Amanda Seyfried Is pretty amazing. Sydney Sweeney and her “good jeans” are smokin’. Directed by Paul Feig who does a lot of random TV, created Freaks and Geeks (which I love), and directed Bridesmaids (one of the most hilarious movies of the 2010s). He’s competent. Don’t think I really care for the male lead, one Brandon Sklenar. He’s 0-for-2 in the last couple months with another wooden performance in last year’s Drop.
 
Has some Single White Female/Hand That Rocks the Cradle vibes. It’s a lot of fun though predictable and not everything makes a whole lot of sense. One of those good-for-them flicks.

Play Misty for Me: A Cautionary Tale of Sticking Your Dick in Crazy in Clint Eastwood's Directorial Debut

Play Misty for Me - Clint Eastwood - 1971  

 

★★★ - “I did it because I LOVE YOU!” Terrifying shit. What I call “Dude doesn’t know crazy pussy” movies. Pretty good, though not a sensitive portrayal of mental illness. Nor does it pass the Bechtel Test. But it’s fine. Not trying to be a nuanced exploration of mental health. It's a horror movie, and it does that job pretty well. 

The film stars Clint Eastwood, in his directorial debut, who plays a character that's too horny and dumb to survive in society. He's the kind of guy who sleeps with a woman who is stalking him. She does some creepy shit. Then she sleeps with him again. If you’ve ever fantasized about how to blow up your life spectacularly and then went through with it, you probably get what’s going on.  

Eastwood can’t leave it alone either. Blows off the chick he was into to canoodle his stalker. Keeps letting her into his life. Then she gets copies of his keys made, and shit really hits the fan.    

In one of my favorite scenes, two dudes see Eastwood and Lucille Bluth (Jessica Walter) fighting over his keys. They are like, “you okay lady?” and she loses her mind. They are like, “uh, that guy seems to be in enough trouble.” They see the crazy from a mile away, but this idiot, not so much.   

Fatal Attraction takes a lot of inspiration from this flick, another classic in the "fucking crazy pussy" genre. In both films, men aren’t so much oblivious to the clear signs of danger, they just don’t care. Testaments to the power of keeping your dick in your pants.   

In another cool, but gratuitous, scene, Eastwood, his main chick, her roommate, and some stoner work buddy go to the Monterey Jazz Festival which is awesome. Then we get a 70s cliché portrayal of a gay guy, which is less awesome. Eastwood's character tells him to "go cruise some sailors or something", to which he retorts something about hating seafood. Real nice. Not exactly a shining moment for representation.   

The violence in the film is intense and realistic. Been watching a lot of O.J. stuff. The idea of being attacked by someone with a knife is terrifying, and the film doesn't shy away from showing the brutality of it.    

Like when Walter slices the cleaning lady up for seeing her out of her fucking mind. Though it gets unrealistic, or some weird statement about the justice system from old right-wing Eastwood, when dude is at work and gets a call from Walter after she’s gotten out of the psych ward. He takes all this way too nonchalantly. Then he wakes up to her trying to stab him. But it’s cool as this guy takes stab wounds like a champ, which is also obviously not super realistic.   

In summary, if upon meeting a woman, she knows everything about you and tells you she loves you within a couple of minutes, don't fuck her.

Single White Female - Barbet Schroeder - 1992

★★★-Saw this when I was way too young, at around 10, and it has haunted me ever since. To this day I warn people of the dangers of living with someone you don't know who may start trying to look like you to give your boyfriend fellatio. Revisiting for my second watch after 30 years, the movie is still creepy as shit, but this mostly comes out of the incredible performances and memorable scene as the movie is pretty shit. I feel especially leads Leigh and Fonda are going all out in what amounts to a trashy movie. 

So let's get to it. Gist is one Allison Jones (Bridget Fonda) catches her fiancee cheating and kicks him out. To make ends meet, she begins to rent an apartment room to one Heady Carlson (Jennifer Jason Leigh). At first its all great. Puppies, hanging out and watching old movies, swapping jewelry. Then Fonda starts getting back with Sam and things go down hill immediately. 

Ger

Directed by Barbet Schroeder. He did the 1995 remake of Kiss of Death with a killer ensemble cast that includes David Caruso, Samuel L. Jackson, and Nicolas Cage. Cage's performance in that flick is bananas if you've never seen it. Anyway, this film stars Bridget Fonda, Jennifer Jason Leigh (JJL) as the psycho biddy, and Steven Weber as Fonda's on again, off again fiancée. 

Fonda is extra cute. Looks a whole lot like a girl I date in grad school. Two of my old man's gems were “son, never date a chick with shorter hair than you,” and “son, never date a redhead with shorter hair than you.” This might be a thing for me. Anyway, so, everyone is thirsty as shit for Fonda in an extremely creepy way. Ned Ryerson gets all rapey. “It's a doozy!” JJL (who also throws herself at Steven Weber) is also obviously thirsty for her. Fonda is constantly oversleeping, causing her to be tardy though, which is super unattractive. 

Some real what the shit is happening red flags that characters just keep ignoring in regard to Heady. First, there is stuff with a dog. As soon I saw that puppy, I had a really shit feeling. JJL kicks at it once and it ends up dead. This at the 42-minute mark. The coming down with the same haircut is a real what in the actual fuck moment. But the most WTF happens with Steven Weber in his hotel room when we get to see his O-face. Some rape shit from this chick. 

Ew

At one point, near the end, JJL hints that Fonda would get blamed for all the murder and such because people would think that it was actually Fonda as they look just alike. Would have been an even scarier movie if no one had actually seen JJL or there weren't other breadcrumbs that suggested she exists. As is, since several people have seen her at this point and her parents are calling and so forth, it is more just another way that JJL is messing with her mind. 

Lastly, I know it is hard to end a movie, but this ending was bad. After all the action goes down, Fonda's character gives an incredibly dumb voice-over to take us out. The gist of it is basically, “I cried every day for a week, but my gay best friend says I should get over it. I guess I need to move on. That was JJL's problem, she never moved on. Don't want to end up like her. She taught me a lot.” WTF? That's what you're leaving us with? Fine, whatever. 

Pearl - Ti West - 2022

★★★★- Thought the Maria Goth performance was GREAT but the movie was not. Close though. Love a period horror movie. Many allusions to The Wizard of Oz, which was interesting and cool. Also love Ti West. And this Mia Goth is something special. Never better than when she was playing hero ball. 

This is the second of a trilogy. Takes place during WWI. The origin story of the psycho biddy from the first film, who was played by Goth as well who had dual roles in the flick. Get to see her Hollywood dreams and the seeds of craziness growing into violent psychopathy. Nice. 

In addition to Goth, film stars David Corenswet, Emma Jenkins-Purro, Matthew Sunderland, and Tandi Wright, none of whom I recognized. 

Super captivating and memorable. Liked the style and music. Love the final scene too. That was uncomfortable and awesome. You could hear people in the theater being like WTF. Love those kinds of communal view experiences. Excited AF for that third installment, which goes to the 1980s.