Top 10 of 2025: 3. Eddington

★★★★★--Another film that I absolutely adored that I suspect will be in my top 10 for the decade. A Covid movie about mask mandates, political divisions, and unwillingness to compromise, even when it means death. 

Shares some DNA with Needful Things, except the thing that they all want is a speck of power.  We basically see a man whose desperate grasps for authority results in further loss of power/control, a guy that can’t get out of his own way. He’s not the only one, of course, as everyone lives in their own separate reality. Everyone realizes there is something wrong, but what that is and who they blame is different, even though in the end, they all have the same enemy. 

Great performances from a great cast—Joaquin Phoenix, Deirdre O’Connell, Emma Stone, Pedro Pascal, Austin Butler, and others—another Ari Aster home run. His fourth film—Hereditary, Midsommar, and Beau Is Afraid—he hasn’t made a bad movie in my book. For me, this and Midsommar are my favs. 

Sick - John Hyams - 2022

★★★★-You had me at home invasion slasher from Blumhouse written by Kevin Williamson of Scream, I Know What You Did Last Summer, and The Faculty fame. The whole COVID-19 backdrop is having a smart toilet in April 2020 shit. With that, I was able to make due with the rolls I embezzled from work until the supply chain stabilized. Fuck yeah. 

So how was it? Not too bad. Fun, tight slasher that made me sort of nostalgic for the start of the pandemic when I thought I was going to die and never left the house. Fun times those were. Also fun, a movie that gets some audience participation, which this film does by throwing us back into the early days of the lockdown. 

The flick follows two best buds, Parker (Gideon Adlon) and Miri (Bethlehem Million), riding it out at one of their parents' secluded lake house. To try and make quarantine “fun”, Parker’s on-again, off-again DJ (Dylan Sprayberry) shows up. He's trying to save whatever they have after a video surfaces of her making out with some other dude on spring break or whatever. Soon after they hit the hay, shit goes down. A masked killer (remember, social distancing!) slips in, steals their phones, and begins to terrorize them, first with loud music and then violence. Major plot hole here, by the by, why not just kill everyone in their sleep and not wake them up with bullshit? Sport/torture, I guess, plus we gotta get to it somehow. 

Adlon was the only young person I really recognized, though they all are pretty stellar. You may remember her from Blockers. I sort of get her confused with Mikey Madison who was Manson gal Sadie Atkins in Once Upon a Time In Hollywood, one of the kids in the fifth Scream movie, one of the daughters in Better Things, so forth. What is weird is that Better Things is a show where Pamela Adlon raises her girls, one who looks just like this woman. Then I find out the star of this movie is Pamela Adlon's real daughter. Some others that show up are one of the Langmores from Ozark, Marc Menchaca, who's lane is apparently creepy lake person, and the actress Jane Adams whom I recognize from The Anniversary Party and Happiness which I've been trying to forget since watching in 1999, fucking IFC. One Joel Courtney makes an appearance and is murdered at the beginning. I couldn't place him but looked him up. He was the main kid in Super 8, which was great. Only other things I've seen from director John Hyams was the exorcism episode from the second season of Chucky, a show I'm kind of obsessed with, and an alright movie from 2020 called Alone. Someone else in the movie that is sort of interesting is one Chris Reid. He is Brad Pitt's stunt double. Pretty good likeness. 

Besides the irritating plot hole, there were a couple other things that maybe should've been work shopped. Not trying to give anything away here, but the whole vengeance/motivation was a little weak. However, it isn't obvious. Also, I guess everyone's motivation for becoming a slasher in these types of movies is pretty bullshitty. So whatever. 

The other thing is that the killer thinks they're going to get away with it. When a victim points out that there is DNA everywhere, the solution is to burn down the house and the cops will blame it on selfish kids who couldn't social distance nor even keep a cabin from going up in flames. Well, that won't work since there are murders at multiple locations and people that aren't even part of the group. Whatever, best not to overthink. But these things were sort of dumb. 

However, all in all, this is a film that pays off. It snapshots a collective shitty time for everyone, and offers some surprises. Not a lot more I could ask for. Good shit.

Borat Subsequent Moviefilm is the greatest movie of all time

What is more dangerous? This virus or the democrat?... My daddy is the smartest person in the whole flat world. Official title is Borat Subsequent Moviefilm: Delivery of Prodigious Bribe to American Regime for Make Benefit Once Glorious Nation of Kazakhstan. If you don't think Sacha Baron Cohen is a genius, then we probably can't be friends as you are probably going to defend Rudy Giuliani who was totally masturbating. 

Rotten Tomato Consensus: Borat Subsequent Moviefilm proves Sacha Baron Cohen's comedic creation remains a sharp tool for exposing the most misguided -- or utterly repugnant -- corners of American culture.

Gist is that Sacha Baron Cohen as Borat, the fictional Kazakh journalist and television personality, offers daughter Tutar (played by Maria Bakalova) to Vice President Mike "Penis" as a bride. When that doesn't work, he settles for Giuliani, who tries to get his dick hard on hidden camera which he claims was ye olde tucking in his shirt routine. Not even a funny euphemism, bra. There are also shenanigans at a debutante ball and lots of other CPAC type events, and various COVID-19 pandemic hijinx as well. 

After all that, though, the movie is surprisingly touching. First there is the relationship that builds between Borat and his daughter. It's super sweet. There is the babysitter that Borat hires to watch his daughter that does some amateur therapy with the two of them, which comes off as genuine.  Then there were Holocaust survivors he meets when he is doing his anti-semitic schtick. These women greet him with such kindness it is incredible. Meanwhile, Borat carries around a bag with a dollar sign on it and is dressed like this:

And finally, during the COVID pandemic, Borat stops at a liquor store. Whilst there, he asks a man where everyone is. The guy tells him about the pandemic. Borat then asks if he can stay with the guy. Cut to him with this guy and his roommate. These guys, Jerry Holleman and Jim Russell, are two Trump-supporting conspiracy theorists. They seem to actually care about Borat's well being and are extremely kind to him. I mean, no way I would have said yes to that request. And these two guys were like, fuck it. Of course them helping Borat write a “Wuhan Flu Song,” with lyrics like “Obama, what we gonna do? Inject him with the Wuhan flu” and “Journalists, what we gonna do? Chop ’em up like the Saudis do,” doesn't help their case. By the by, Borat, in disguise as a southern Trump fanatic, lots of layers here, obviously, performed this catchy tune at an alt-right rally opposing the lockdown. He got the crowd to sing along to the racist lyrics before the croud figured out they were being mocked and turned on him, nearly killing him. These dudes, though, were pretty proud of their new friend in a sort of, "wow, look at him go," way. At one point, while hanging out with these dudes, Borat says that he "hope quartine never end." OMG. 

Obvious MVP is Sacha Baron Cohen. I mean, true genius. But Bakalova is super solid as well. Then there is a girl at the deb ball that gets an honorable mention. So Borat asks this girl's dad how much he thought he could get if he tried to sell his daughter. The dad, a real piece of work here, says "$500." His daughter, super pissed, gives him a look that has to be seen to appreciate, and says, "that is FUCK-ING gross." Good for her. Gave me a lot of hope.