Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2 is the greatest movie of all time

Saw Guardians of the Galaxy: Vol. 2 in the 3D which I'd recommend as it looks pretty good. Movie is solid. Lot to like here... buuuuuuut there are some things.

Rotten Tomato Consensus: Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2's action-packed plot, dazzling visuals, and irreverent humor add up to a sequel that's almost as fun -- if not quite as thrillingly fresh -- as its predecessor.

Russell mansplaining about what being a god is all about

Pros: Beautifully done with great visual effects. On point cast as the previous one with a few really solid cameos. The Watchers show up for the first time in the Marvel Cinematic Universe, at least that I recall. Very funny.

Cons: Tries a little too hard, maybe. Sort of like a more eh version of the original.

Disclaimer: My notes pretty much always contain some spoilers but I rarely give away the ending.

Little guy

Start with the stuff I really liked. Going in, I was concerned about the baby Groot. Watching previews and for around the first quarter of the movie, I was like, “eh, little guy.” But by the end, I was all, “aw, little guy.” He's so dumb and helpless. He also does just enough where he isn't annoying, for the most part. Really start to like him when the Ravagers shit all over him (metaphorically) and when he is put in charge of helping out his mates, he generally fails spectacularly.

Basically, if you were into the characters in the first one, empathized with them and what not, then you'll get lots of that. Pratt is cool. His relationship with Kurt Russell's character, Russell fucking rocked by the way, involves lots of blue lightning, be warned. The big dude is funny as hell. The green chick gets lots of screen time to deal with her shit. Same with Daryl's brother from The Walking Dead. He is sort of the one you really feel for in this one. We also get a glimpse of what it would be like for an everyman type of guy to have godlike powers, which is cool. 

The last thing worth mentioning, which I will try not to give too much away on here, is Stan Lee's cameo adds credence to a theory that has been posed about his role in the Marvel Cinematic Universe/Marvel movies in general. Overall, the movie is funny as hell and lots of fun.

Now the other stuff. It doesn't really seem like the series is really going anywhere except for maybe exploring Quill's (Pratt) origin story. I know how this fits into the MCU but it feels totally isolated from all that shit. Also, the fight scenes are sometimes just way too long. Often get the feeling in films like this that I watching someone else play a video game.

A gold chick looking fucking cool

It's obviously not a serious movie. Lots of jokes and gags and lots of over the top action. But it's like they are seriously trying to funny which works but sometimes sort of doesn't. An example of this is with this character that chooses to call himself Taserface. He basically goes into this long monologue where he is telling the former leader of his Ravager Clan, Yondu, whom he is just successfully mutinied against, that he is weak and stupid and taking them down the wrong path and that it is time for their clan to rise to glory under the leadership of a new captain: Taserface! Rocket the Raccoon then just rips on him for the next five minutes of the movie. None of it is really funny. Then when he gets his comeuppance, all fucked up, barely alive from various injuries, he crawls over to a monitor to summon the Sovereign, one of the several groups the Guardians have beef with here that are solid gold and look fucking cool and fight using these sweet drones that they control from video game console type things, and tells them the group's coordinates so that they can come and kill them and in his mind avenge his death. He just wants them to tell the Guardians that it was he, Taserface, that did them in. The chick he talks to, however, just laughs at his name as he explodes and dies. Weak. There is some other stuff like this that is like, “whatever.”

Looking at some reviews, which I usually don't do, to find ways others explained it, I came across this in the Times, “The difference (between the original and sequel) is that while the first 'Guardians' earned that love as if by accident, this one begs for it,” which is spot on. Other than some of that stuff though it is fucking great and is totally solid by anyone's standards. I'm sure it's gonna be huge.