Pet Sematary: Bloodlines – Digs up more than just corpses

Pet Sematary: Bloodlines - Lindsey Anderson Beer - 2023 

★★★-I love Stephen King, and I liked this book. The first movie from 1989 was okay. The sequels and the remake sucked. This movie was okay to good. Better than expected. Plus, I think there is potential for a prequel from ancient times that could be super dope.  

Gist goes thus: Goes back to 1969, 50 years before the shenanigans of the previous film, before young Jud Crandall had a Mainer accent. Follow him as he starts to learn about the infamous local cemetery with a rather unique selling point - “the dead don't stay dead, thay-ah.” But, as we know, messing with the natural order of things never ends well. 

The film delves into Jud's family legacy, interesting though not so cheery. He's also apparently tied to his hometown, Ludlow, by this legacy and an ancient evil that's been hanging around since the town's inception. All the founders’ lineage is, I guess.  

Directed by Lindsey Anderson Beer in her first swing in the chair. She also co-wrote the script with Jeff Buhler. It's a prequel to the 2019 Pet Sematary, itself a reimagining of Stephen King's 1983 novel. 

Cast is pretty stellar.  Stars Jackson White, the son of actress Katey Sagal (Peggy from Married with Children, and Lela in Futurama) and drummer Jack White, not the Jack White, as Jud. Others include Forrest Goodluck (Hawk in The Revenant), Jack Mulhern (who always plays a druggy, out of control type, he was Dylan in Mare of Easttown and Tyler Kryger in Painkiller, for example), Henry Thomas (Elliot from E.T. the Extra-Terrestrial) as the patriarch Crandall, Natalie Alyn Lind (Silver St. Cloud in Gotham) who plays Jud’s girlfriend and is quite the looker, Isabella Star LaBlanc who plays Goodluck’s sister and is also quite a looker, Samantha Mathis (mostly think of her as Courtney Rawlinson in American Psycho), Pam Grier, and David Duchovny. Duchovny’s character sets all of this shit in motion when he brings back his son in the first minute of the movie. He, Duchovny’s boy, apparently killed himself after returning from Vietnam. Every Vietnam vet I’ve ever known has had a pretty hard life. Don’t envy being of that age. 

Also stars a very good boy named Jellybean who plays a zombie dog. You can read about this guy here in People magazine.  

She has hinted she wants to expand the universe, delving deeper into the origins of the evil that's been causing all this undead nonsense. By October, the producers were on board, considering a sequel and even more installments to further explore the demonic entity behind the franchise's horrific events. Cool cool. 

Little detail I loved was the scene when Jud goes to hockey tryouts with his old man, watching the young kids. Have things like that with my dad. Golden gloves, basketball sectionals, Indiana/Kentucky All-Star Game, so forth. Definitely always going to cherish those memories. 

Overall, Pet Sematary: Bloodlines is a huge step up from the 2019 remake. While maybe it's still not quite hitting the mark, I thought it was pretty not bad. The concept of a magic graveyard that brings back pets and, later, less-than-lovely people from the dead is cool, but it’s devastion is never better than in King’s novel, in my opinion. Though this is probably the best it’s ever been as a film. 

You People - Kenya Barris - 2023

★★★ - Not bad at all. You can't really miss with this group of talent. Kenya Barris and Jonah Hill's writing is on point. Hill's character is great too. David Duchovny, Julia Louis-Dreyfus, Eddie Murphy, Nia Long. Then the cameos are something as well. I won't spoil those.

Gist is Hill, culturally Jewish, meets Lauren London, a black woman. They hit it off and their relationship progresses to the meet the parents to get the hand stage. All the parents are embarrassingly terrible in totally different ways. One of those will their love survive the cultural/generational differences along with their parents' expectations. It might sound lame, but it is done really well.

Several scenes stand out for their exceptional writing. The one where Hill's character is at the synagog is stellar. So funny it's insane. A doctor asks Hill about his dick. Says he'll look at it for free in the bathroom. He declines. We then find out he is an orthodontist. That's one thing I really appreciated about the writing. How the jokes are patient. Like we find out that London's family are Muslim. Eventually we find that they are actually Nation of Islam and Hill tries to explain why he loves Louis Farrakhan.

Murphy is actually a really funny straight man, which was surprising. Hill could have played hero ball he was so on fire, but he didn't need to. Duchovny had a few hilarious moments, like when Hill leaves him with London to check his mom, Louis-Dreyfus (who is insane and such a familiar-type of “cool” mom), and finds him playing the piano and singing John Legend. “Dad, what the fuck?” Mike Epps, an Indianapolis native, is an absolutely incredible heat-check. He totally stole the show.

However, I thought the end was stupid, made worse by the sappy score. Also, I'm not buying London and Hill as a couple. Anyone who is partners with Nipsey Hussle and Lil Wayne isn't going to seem right with the likes of Jonah Hill.